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What I’ve Learned as a Mother About My Children’s Poor Choices

Two adults facing a wall with shadow of little girl in backgorund, in foreground the girl is adult

My two children are grown and living their lives. Is it the life I would have chosen for either of them? No

Do I leave the door open if life throws them a significant curve ball? Yes.

I used to feel guilty when I heard they were struggling or were in a tumultuous relationship. When they were making stupid decisions, I’d ask myself, "What did we do wrong"?

I lost sleep, worried, and beat myself up. I’ve tried reliving their childhoods in my mind.

Were we perfect parents? No, but I’ve realized that there is no such thing. Were my parents perfect? By no means.

We did our very best, like my parents did. Did we come out with some scars? Sure.

We have overcome the same challenges and built successful lives benefiting society.

I’m learning that each of us must experience life on our terms. We make choices and live with the consequences. Some of us learn faster or learn by watching others' mistakes. Some people learn the hard way. And unfortunately, some people never learn.

I’ve concluded that I can pray for my children and try to be the best example I can be. The rest is up to them.

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